no one warns you

Its Saturday night, Gavin is over at a teammates watching football and I have found myself with some free time to blog!

When I say that I have time to blog, we wont mention the laundry pile or dishes in the sink.

Anyway... Im reaching out for prayers tonight.

I simply cant stop worrying about Kenley and really need to calm down.

To fill you in, in the last 3 months she has had about four episodes in which she becomes very pale, shakey and lethargic. Her huge blue eyes get dark circles around them and she just does NOT look right. She snaps out of it after having something to eat and laying down for a while but I really feel like something is not quite right about it.

The first time it happened, I took her to see her doctor right away and he attributed it to a recent vaccination... which didnt make me feel ANY better and caused me to obviously question our vaccination choices.

At her last visit I mentioned it again (after it happened a second time) and he said it sounded more like low blood sugar, which DID make me feel a little more at ease, but Im still not convinced.

Tonight she did it again and I got to the point of a near panic attack. Her coloring and the circles under her eyes really threw me off. I made her some dinner and she perked up a little in the bath tub. And let me just say that when that girls hair is wet and up against her head after I pour water on it, she is ALL eyes hahaha. those things are HUGE, and when there are big purple rings around them she looks a little scary! (k, now I have myself laughing and a little more relaxed) .

The evening ended with Gavin very sweetly trying to calm me down after I got on the computer and started googling the worst case scenarios. new moms: DO NOT DO THAT!!

Anyway... please pray for Kenley. I will be calling her doctor first thing Monday morning and hoping to get some better answers. That darn co-pay keeps me from going in to see him at every worrysome moment.

The title of this post comes from the fact that I keep thinking to myself how much no one warns you about how much you will WORRY! If they are crying, you are worried. If they are too quiet, you are worried. If they dont sleep, you worry. If all they want to do is sleep, you worry. THE LIST GOES ON!

So why didnt anyone tell me how much I would worry about her???? Maybe because they didnt want me to? Maybe because its not something us moms consciously do? Either way, I find myself a nervous wreck lately and really need to calm down... so say another little prayer for me too.


On a happier note, I loved the rainy day we had today. It feels like we actually might be heading into winter. Im dying to turn on the Christmas music and hang a few lights. We are going home for TWO full weeks in December and I am literally counting down the days.

In the mean time I am brainstorming (sitting on Pinterest) for fun little DIY Christmas gifts.

Also...Im hoping to have some exciting news in the next couple of weeks... and no, it has nothing to do with me being pregnant. hint: once a Seawolf, MIGHT be a Seawolf again... :::fingerscrossed::::