Thankful...

Just a quick post a couple minutes before midnight, making it officially Thanksgiving.

It is a HUGE pet peeve of mine when people call it "Turkey Day."

God forbid we should take a moment to relfect on the things that we THANKful for.

So I had to do just that.

It does feel a little weird that I wont be spending the day with my own family tomorrow but I am so THANKful that Gavin's mom and brother drove down to spend the holiday with us. We had a great time hitting all the local thrift stores today. They are so easy and fun to be around and I geniunely could not have married into a better family. So I am starting my post by being thankful for my in-laws... I bet not too many bloggers can say that! haha

Next, I am thankful for the fact that we have FRIENDS in Riverside this Thanksgiving. I cant help but remember how DESPERATE for company I was down here at this exact time last year. Thanksgiving was the first time we had come home after the big move and I remember dreading everyone asking me how it was going down here and how I was liking it. I remember getting ready to land at SFO and spotting the Golden Gate Bridge through the fog and just balling my eyes out. Its crazy to think that I was totally content staying down here this year and celebrating with some GREAT people that I absolutely adore. (Our friends the Weakly's have invited us over to share in their families fesitivites.)

Sounds very generic but I am most thankful for my immediate little family. The overwhelming gratefulness that I have for Gavin and Kenley is more than I can describe..... I sit here not knowing what else to say about that because it leaves me speechless. I thank God every day for blessing me with those two.

I am thankful for our little shack, which is so much more than some people have. This little place has been so perfect for our family and I have grown to love it.

I will end with being thankful for a God who continually amazes me with the many blessings that my family and I have been given. I am so thankful for His grace. Whenever I worry about the future, or even the present, I give THANKS knowing that He has huge plans for us!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone

Jess

first best friends

Kenley has her first bestie!

Her name is Mae.... daughter to my completely fabulous Kissui friend Jill.

Jill is sweet enough to help with Kenley on Thursdays while I work. She also has a little 3 year old boy named Myles who is also so sweet with Kenley. These three together are a hoot and I wish I could watch them the whole time although Jill is so good about filling me in on all the adorable details. Kenley copies everything these two do (including dancing with a diaper on her head).

Mae is exactly 10 days older and Kenley. It is SO fun watching her with a little girl exactly her age. They play really well together... and are always hugging :)

Jill told me that when Kenley leaves may says "WEE-WEEEEE" and signs "more". "wee-wee" meaning Kenley and more meaning that she wants her to come back.

Thank you Hollen family for being so good to our girl.

UCR baseball family

I know what you must be thinking... TWO posts in one week?? I barely manage to get ONE in.

But I just had to share something that is really special to me!

Last night was the second game of Gavins "Fall World Series." Basically the team is divided in two (chosen by Gavin and the other seniors) and they play a three game scrimage against each other. It was FREEZING at the feild. But SO good to be back! I remember blogging when the season ended and realzing just how much I would miss going to the games. After the third game of the series today they wont practice again (besides on their own) until we get back from Christmas break.

I sincerly LOVE the friends that UCR baseball has provided for our little family. Some of the parents, girlfriends, families we dont see besides the game (and we love them too) but others have taken us in as their own.

Last night made me realize just how hard it will be this season between chasing Kenley around on those VERY frightening bleachers, foul balls and trying to keep her warm. Not that I wont have TONS of help. She went from person to person last night and after everyone got their turn with her, they were still willing to walk around with her so I could take a little bit of a break and watch the game. Everyone is SO good with her.

While I havent been so fond of Riverside itself, I cant imagine Gavin being in any other program. I adore these families and cant thank them enough for being so endearing.

go highlanders,

Jess

no one warns you

Its Saturday night, Gavin is over at a teammates watching football and I have found myself with some free time to blog!

When I say that I have time to blog, we wont mention the laundry pile or dishes in the sink.

Anyway... Im reaching out for prayers tonight.

I simply cant stop worrying about Kenley and really need to calm down.

To fill you in, in the last 3 months she has had about four episodes in which she becomes very pale, shakey and lethargic. Her huge blue eyes get dark circles around them and she just does NOT look right. She snaps out of it after having something to eat and laying down for a while but I really feel like something is not quite right about it.

The first time it happened, I took her to see her doctor right away and he attributed it to a recent vaccination... which didnt make me feel ANY better and caused me to obviously question our vaccination choices.

At her last visit I mentioned it again (after it happened a second time) and he said it sounded more like low blood sugar, which DID make me feel a little more at ease, but Im still not convinced.

Tonight she did it again and I got to the point of a near panic attack. Her coloring and the circles under her eyes really threw me off. I made her some dinner and she perked up a little in the bath tub. And let me just say that when that girls hair is wet and up against her head after I pour water on it, she is ALL eyes hahaha. those things are HUGE, and when there are big purple rings around them she looks a little scary! (k, now I have myself laughing and a little more relaxed) .

The evening ended with Gavin very sweetly trying to calm me down after I got on the computer and started googling the worst case scenarios. new moms: DO NOT DO THAT!!

Anyway... please pray for Kenley. I will be calling her doctor first thing Monday morning and hoping to get some better answers. That darn co-pay keeps me from going in to see him at every worrysome moment.

The title of this post comes from the fact that I keep thinking to myself how much no one warns you about how much you will WORRY! If they are crying, you are worried. If they are too quiet, you are worried. If they dont sleep, you worry. If all they want to do is sleep, you worry. THE LIST GOES ON!

So why didnt anyone tell me how much I would worry about her???? Maybe because they didnt want me to? Maybe because its not something us moms consciously do? Either way, I find myself a nervous wreck lately and really need to calm down... so say another little prayer for me too.


On a happier note, I loved the rainy day we had today. It feels like we actually might be heading into winter. Im dying to turn on the Christmas music and hang a few lights. We are going home for TWO full weeks in December and I am literally counting down the days.

In the mean time I am brainstorming (sitting on Pinterest) for fun little DIY Christmas gifts.

Also...Im hoping to have some exciting news in the next couple of weeks... and no, it has nothing to do with me being pregnant. hint: once a Seawolf, MIGHT be a Seawolf again... :::fingerscrossed::::

week love

It's Sunday night and I am not sad to see the weekend go....

On the phone tonight with my mom I said something that I always THINK but didnt realize was actually comepletly acurrate. I like the week much more than the weekend.

The week provides so much more of a schedule for me and the fam. I work all weekend anyway, so its really not any kind of a break!

During the week I can tell you exactly when I work (in & out of the house)... I can tell you exactly when I clean, when Kenley naps, when I work-out, when I RELAX, when I cook (aka when we eat) etc.

Im so grateful of the help I get during our hectic weeks. Between the girls at work and friends/neighbors I feel so confident that Kenley is well taken care of while Im at work and I appreciate the help so much... not just because I cant bring Kenley with me to work anymore but because we both need the break. I can already tell that Kenley loves the time she spends with other kids/babies. And I love the challenge I get from working and the interaction with other adults.... which seems simple enough but I know its good for the both of us.

On Tuesday Kenley has a playdate at Kayte and Teigans (I work with Kayte and Teigan is her adorable little 10 month old boy) and Thursday she will be hanging with her friends Mae and Myles at Jill's ( who I also work with)... where she had so much fun last week. Mae is exactly Kenley's age so they are really fun to watch together.

other things Im looking foward to this WEEK:  On Wednesday Im going to a Partylite party at my friend Amber's out in Grand Terrace... never been to one! ...also seeing one of my favorite bands EVER in Temecula on Sunday THE BAND PERRY. and one week from tomorrow is Halloween!! so excited to see Kenley all dressed up and carving pumpkins.

see.. told you the week is better... so make it a good one!


jess

p.s. in the same phone conversation with my mom tonight she told me that she had been down visiting my Nana today. My nana gave my mom a copy of the local newspaper where she had posted a small memorial to my dad's dad (her husband, my "Pap") who passed away 13 years ago today. it read...

"you left us thirteen years ago. we now have a beautiful great-granddaughter, her name is Kenley."

this indian summer

I find when I actually have interesting things to blog about, I am too busy to do so... anyone out there in the same boat?

anyway, our little clan is just trying to survive this late heat.

Im trying to cook more, have several Pinerest projects in the works, continuing my morning hikes and chasing after my babbling toddler.

She has so much to say these days.

On the way to church this morning this was telling us an entire story, using every consonant and vowel in the English language (using her hands and everything).

My new favorite thing she does: playing with my eyelashes as I rock her to sleep <3

-Mama Mills

homesick... already

as you can see I took a little blogging break. I actually took a break from everything while we were up north for a week.

we flew in yesterday morning and I have been in a funk ever since. it was the best trip we have ever taken home and needless to say I was not ready to leave. every trip we take home is amazing but this one made it very hard to say goodbye. knowing that we wouldnt be back for almost three months leaves me with knots in my stomach and tears that I keep fighting off. Ive tried to put on a happy face and keep in mind that I always go though this every time we leave but its really got me thinking. I know that we will be here until Gavin finshes school, thats a given. But as for the next step, I just dont know. Gavin and I both miss "home" SO much.

But here we are for the next year or so and I am ready to make the most of it.

I try to bottle up our trips home in my memory bank to keep me going on the long, hot, smoggy days. (we are supposed to be in the 90s all week again).

sorry I dont have more to say this morning. Im homesick, tired, and I just dont have the words :(