happy holidays from our little fam to yours...

I have officially promised my good friend Makalya Harrison to be a better blogger, so now I guess I really do have to stick to my word. And speaking of miss Makayla, let me start this post with a HUGE congrats to her and her future hubby on their engagement!! Her ring is almost as pretty as she is :)
As I type today Kenley and I are listening to our Christmas music on Pandora... which by the way has to be the best invetnion ever. I use it more than usual during the holidays, but NEVER listen to Christmas music before Thanksgiving. And for the first time in 3 whole years, Christmas music finally makes me happy again. I was afraid that Christmas would never be the same for my family and I after the loss of my Uncle Ken on Christmas Eve. Our family has come so far in these short 3 years and I still miss him more than ever. This Thanksgiving I really felt his presence more than I felt sad that he is gone. It seemed like he could just round the corner at any moment.
The last place that I talked to him in person, before I kissed him goodbye in the hospital for the last time, was a walk that we took in Westwood Hills in Napa by my house the day after Thanksgiving. All of the cousins had stayed at my parents house and myself, my aunts, uncles, Mom & Dad all decided to take a walk. Before I knew it, my Uncle Ken and I were up ahead of everyone else having our own little discussion. I was a sophomore at SSU at this point, and really just at a kind of weird point in my life. I was half-way through my golf season and basically half-dedicated.... I wanted to quit. I had almost completely fallen away from God, had some not so great influences in my life and was not doing well in school. My Uncle knew all of this. I remember begging him to help me talk my mom into letting me take some time off from school. I wanted to take the spring semester off and move to Tahoe... haha! imagine that.
We walked and talked, talked and walked... then raced to the top of the hilll where you can see all of Napa. I will never ever forget it. So every year since, the day after Thanksgiving, I do the same walk. Unfortunately, this year, I sat in my car in the parking lot of Westwood Hills because we were all in such a rush, said a prayer of my Aunt Barb and cousins who I know miss him even more than I do and just had a moment.
Gosh, well that was heavy and totally not where I planned on going with this post at all! God is so so good and I know my Uncle would be so proud of me. He would be so happy to see how good Gavin is to me and probably so amazed by this little miracle of a baby that we get to call our own. OH yeah, and completely honored that we named her after him :)
And on that note! What a little miracle she is. Everyone at home was so so so happy and excited to see her. She was such a good little traveler during our Thanksgiving trip. She slept the entire plane ride to SFO and didnt make a peep on the 8 hour drive home! I was worried about both and she totally proved me wrong.
She is just doing all KINDS of new stuff that I feel like she started doing all at the same time. At Gavin's "team Thanksgiving" the night before we flew home, she was sitting on my lap and stuck her finger in my sweet potatoes and then stuck her fingers in her mouth. Now you tell ME shes not ready for solids!! haha!! It was totally hilarious and even Gavins teammates who know nothing about babies/milestones thought it was pretty hilarious.
Besides that little encounter with the sweet potatoes, our little girl is allllllmost sitting up by herself. She can totally do it while sitting on the couch where she sinks in a little bit and definitely when she is holding onto something like her crib. Speaking of her crib, Kenley has totally and completely been sleeping through the night for the past month now. Goes down at 7:30pm and is up at 6am... a little early for my liking but that is a near 11 hour stretch, people!!! I will take it.
She didnt do quite AS well during our little trip home for Thanksgiving. She was up twice each night while sleeping in her pack n' play but did pretty well all in all. And the most amazing thing of ALL that our little Kenley has started to do...
She TOTALLY knows who her mama is. Someone else besides myself took her out of her pack n' play on Thanksgiving day after she had awoken from her nap and I was in the room as well. She was in this persons arms and looked all around until she spotted me... and THEN, she reached out her little arms for me and let out a squeal! Im not gonna name any names of who was holding her because I dont want to hurt her feelings :::cough::: my mom:::cough:::: LOL sorry mom. I do think it kind of bummed her out. Its not that she doesnt trust her! It just that she is always just with me... 24/7. And we like it that way :)
So yes, it is true, baby girl is a little crankier than usual as well. She is DEFINITELY teething. Every single thing you hand her gets put right into her mouth. Its actually pretty impressive and now we just need to be more careful about things that are in reaching distance. The poor little thing is constantly drooling and you can tell her little gums are really bothering her. I cant WAIT to see that first little tooth though!
So onto our trip home.... we had SUCH a blast. It flew by and I cant believe that we are already home again. It was SO good seeing everyone that I had been missing so much. I had a great time with my beautiful girlfriends, who by the way are so cute with Kenley and love her so much!! And of course both of our families were dying to get their hands on her. All in all, it we had an amazing time and are so THANKFUL that we have such a loving place to go for the holidays. cant wait to come back up in a few weeks for Christmas! We were even able to expereince a little seasonal weather (which we barely get down here at all) I loved watching the sky turn grey and our second night it Cloverdale it even rained. loved every second of it.
WELL!! this turned out to be rather lengthy! I still havent figured out how to attatch pictures and text in the same post, so I will do another post with our "potential" Christmas card photos and pictutes with my family. Bless Caitlin O'Reilly for even attempting to get my circus of a family in one photo... my brothers never fail to make that a real experience for everyone involved. Let me just say that they had me laughing to the point of tears the entire time I was home. Its like we speak our own little language and whenever we get together its like we never missed a beat. Between Stephen doing his strip tease before he got in the hot tub, twirling his shirt around his head and throwing it on some lit candles to Michael and his usual 90's LA hip hop antics... those two are something else. And they are SO cute with their little neice. They both know I have a special place in my heart for Uncles in general and how special the Uncle/neice relationship is to me so to watch them with her completely warms my heart.
Hope everyone is staying warm and enjoyed their holiday!!
hot coco & candy canes, Mama Mills

Our Kenley in her new BOB stroller... 4 1/2 months old today

... hard to blog without a computer!

SHES BACK! ... finally! After almost three weeks without a computer, its finally fixed and I can keep on pluggin along in my online class and blog of course :) The last time I did a post, we had just moved in... I cant believe we have been here for almost two months now. Not a whole lot has changed other than just becoming more adjusted, making new friends, doing my best to keepin touch with old ones and we have had lots of visitors on the weekends. It has meant a lot to me that so many friends/family have been willing to make the drive/flight to come keep me company. I DEFINITELY do not take human interaciton for granted these days. Sometimes I think Im going crazy! I have recently found myself talking to, well... myself. haha!
However, I am so so grateful that I can be a mommy that is home with my baby all day and that I dont have to give her up during the day and be working out of the house. The two of us walk almost every morning, most of the time with a group of girls and their little boys that live in family housing as well. We spend the rest of the day cleaning, reading, playing, going to the park, and cooking. And then while Kenley naps, I do my work. When Gavin gets home from class/practice I do a little more work and THEN usually Kenley is ready to go down for bed about 8 ish and then mommy and daddy get some time together :)
I totally miss Gavin during the day but he is working so hard!! He is out the door SO early and makes it home just in time for dinner. The teams weight lifting regiment is CRAZY hard, and I dont think he has gone one day without being extremely sore. I am so proud of him being able to juggle all of this. He is seriously my hero and I would not be able to do any of this without him.
This weekend, I will be spending my first night away from Kenley... which will be totally bitter sweet. I am going to Vegas for the weekend with my good friend Katie and a group of our girl friends from Sacramento. Gavins parents are coming down from Cloverdale for the weekend to stay with Kenley and Gav while mama gets a little break! I am so looking foward to relaxing for a couple days and seeing some of my very favorite girls but I know I am going to miss my little fam terribly!
Speaking of fam... only 2 weeks until we are coming up to nor cal for Thanksgiving!! I am so excited to be going home and cannot WAIT to see everyone. I have been pretty homesick and someone might have to physically put me back in the car to get me to come back down here. haha only kidding, but it will be SO nice to be home and I am basically counting down the days. Except one minor detail... Kenley HATES the car these days and an 8 hour drive both ways could get a little hectic! But we are going to do most of our driving at night to both avoid traffic and in hopes that baby girl will sleep most of the way.
well Im sorry there wasnt anything to exciting about this post and I hope people are still reading and Im not just typing for my own good!! haha MISS YOU ALL xoxo
Jess

this is home!

Long time no blog!!

hi from Riverside!!! I know I promised I would do an update again before we left but packing/moving was WAY more hectic than I thought it would be. I cannot express enough how relieved I am that is over with. May I just suggest that moving with a 3 month old is not a good idea?!? She was actually completely excellent throughout the whole thing but O-MY-GOODNESS... that girl has more "stuff" than Gavin and I combined. Until we packed up the Uhaul trailer and saw everything in one place, I really did not realize just how much stuff there was. It has taken me the entire week to unpack and get everything in its rightful place. While interior design is not a talent nor an interest of mine, it has been fun setting up our own little place. (I am going to attatch pictures in my next update since I WILL have my usb cord by then!!) Its starting to come together and I really just want to see the finished product already. Of course Kenley's room was the one I wanted to tackle first so hers is the closest to being done.
Which brings me to the fact that Kenley is sleeping in her own room and her own crib!! The first night I was so scared to have her in there by herself. I kept imagining the worst possible situations and kept waking up to check on her or at least stare at the video monitor (coolest thing ever invented by the way). She has done amazing in her crib though. She is asleep by 8pm and sleeps til 6am. I can live with that!!! She seems to really love it here, and i know it has been an adjustment for her too but she is doing better with the change than I could have imagined. She is getting all kinds of big and is making lots of new noises. Her cry is changing and she is CONSTANTLY "talking" to herself. It is soooo cute. I have had so much fun just hanging out with her during the day while I unpack and organize.
As many of you know, and if you were paying attention to the news, we moved in literally the peak day of a record breaking heat wave in LA. Of course right?!? Omygosh, it was unbearable. But three days ago, it dropped below 90 and I was so0o glad!! and thennnn.... after 4 days of being here, a huge storm came up from Mexico and it was STILL in the 90s with thunder, lightening and rain! It was crazy but actually kinda fun! It didnt seem to bother Kenley one bit and she slept right through it all.
And then there is the story of our trip down here!!! I am still thanking God for getting us here safely after our little escapade on hwy 580. Basically... we had everything packed in a trailer that we were pulling behind Gavin's parents Yukon and we were driving on 580 when the trailer broke off, leaving us fishtailing on the freeway dragging the trailer by a safety chain... sparks flying every which way! I really thought we were done. The first thing that flashed into my mind was my cousins car accident and I really thought we were going to flip. So I just threw my body over Kenley and started praying. By doing so I actually blocked a big mirror that slid forward and almost hit Kenley square in the face. I do NOT know how the trailer did not flip. It was a miracle. Andy (Gavins) dad did an amazing job of staying calm, not hitting the brakes and getting us to the side of the road safely.
So after we were all calmed down, we ended up having to wait for Uhaul to open, where we had to unpack everything and repack it into a uhaul van. By the end of all that, it was 4 hours by the time we got back on the road. It took us 14 hours to get to Riverside, my friends!!! ARE WE HAVING FUN YET?!? haha!!
Yes... we are having fun now actually :) Just speaking for myself, it has been a very hard adjustment and our first week here was extremely hard on me. I do pride myself on being one tough cookie but this has been very difficult. It was a week of a lot of tears, homesickness and to be honest... just wanting to go home. Poor Gavin had to basically convince me everyday for about a week straight that this is where we are supposed to be, it WILL get better and that I just need to stay positive. I couldnt help but think how easy that was for him to say. He has a built in group of friends with his team and people that he knows... while I have still yet to meet a single soul. Let me tell you... that when you have a new baby, in a new place knowing no one, it is a very helpless and empty feeling.
HOWEVER!!!... two mornings ago, I woke up and literally decided that this experience is going to be what I make it and that if I sit here and complain, nothing is ever going to improve and I will be limiting myself to my own fears. So basically, here goes nothing!!! So that day I got my gym membership, ran to the rec center for a quality workout, came home feeling like a million bucks and have been feeling great ever since. I came home and made plans for every weekend  through October to keep my mind focused on things to look forward to. Such as going to San Diego to visit friends, friends and family coming HERE! (Kenley's Godmother and one of my best friends Sarah Hosp is coming this weekend & my mom and brother are coming the weekend of Oct 24 to go to Disneyland!!) So excited!!
Tomorrow I am taking Kenley to "My Gym" in Redlands which is about 10 miles away. It is a little baby gym playgroup type of thing where moms bring their babies to play, "exercise" and learn. I am really really excited to go. I used to take my Goddaughter Addie to the one in Santa Rosa and we would always have a BLAST!! Couldnt ever seem to get her out of that darn "ball-pit" though! haha.
and thursday is Moms and Munchkins which is also a mom group that meets in Redlands. So I am willing to give that a shot as well. I will let everyone know how both go!
Attached are a few pictures of our place and a picture of Kenley at my friend Allie's swim meet at SDSU when we went to San Diego last weekend. I made her a shirt that said GO ALLIE and she had her red bucket hat on like a true Aztecs fan in their school colors!!
Alright everyone... saying I miss you doesnt even seem like enough words. Being so far away and without you had made be realize just how truly blessed I am to have such wonderful, supportive, loving friends and family. Thank you so much for all of your good thoughts and prayers for us. love love love jess

a few more I forgot to post :)

Dottie Meyer Photography

Hi everyone!! So sorry that its been a couple of weeks... could facebook be to blame?? maybe! It also might be the fact that we are getting ready for the big move and the count down is on! Like I said, we are up in Cloverdale for our last 2 weeks (well week now) up in norcal spending time with his friends and family. It has been very relaxing, beautiful weather and so much fun with my in-laws that I seriously adore. And I really dont know too many people that can say they love their in-laws as much as I do. They are so good to me and are some of the most generous people I know. I hope to be even half the mother that Patty Mills is. I really feel like I have gotten to know her better since we have been here the past week, and I really do just absolutely adore that woman. She is just amazing. 
Little Kenley is 12 weeks!! Can you believe it?? The pictures above are from when she was 7 weeks old, taken by my moms good friend Dottie Meyer. She is so talented and as you can see, Kenley was a breeze to photograph!  
On that note, Kenley is doing great! Still amazing us every day and making all kinds of advances (at least I think they are advances!!) Her new thing is pulling her binky out and holds onto it with a death grip in her little hands. Fine by me!! One less thing I have to worry about weening her off of!! Also... she is starting to bat at toys hanging infront of her and got her little elephant that plays music when you pull down on the tail to... well play music! I was shocked!! She is starting to finally dig her play mat and tummy time is less tummy time and more "push-up" time. 
As everyone knows, she loves her daddy and is going to miss him so much next week! Gavin is leaving for Riverside THIS sunday and we dont leave til NEXT sunday. Our housing doesnt open up until the 27th and school and baseball start for Gavin the 23rd so he will be staying with a teammate next week. I am going to miss him so much to. We havent spent more than 2 days apart since the day we met :(  and we all know how much he is going to miss Kenley! Personally, I cannot imagine spending a week away from Kenley at this point. 
But omygosh are we so excited to start this new chapter! I cannot wait to be down there together, making our new home, meeting new people (missing the old ones of course) and growing together as a little fam :) I am also so so so excited to be watching Gavin play again. Every time I watch him pitch, I seem to fall in love all over again hehehe its true!!! Something about that baseball uniform ;) 
Well thats about it for now! I promise to write again before we leave and I hope everyone has my new cell phone # at this point! actually.... I can post it here since the blog is private and only my very favorite people can read it!! (707)486-5028.
Nighty Night <3